Chasing Nikki by Lacey Weatherford
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! I can't do this *SOB SOB*
This book ripped me to pieces. OH MY GOD. I am sobbing so hard my eyes are going to fall out. I can't believe this. I. Can't. *SOB SOB SOB SOB*
I'm done. I'm at a loss for words and I can never finish this review. *walks away and falls to the floor convulsing*
Oh God Chase, I'm so sorry.
Okay, so against my better judgment I decided to write my review tonight. Since my emotions have simmered just a bit, I'm still in tears but not sobs. I'm at the numb stage. I cried myself out to exhaustion. My eyes are burning and my throat hurts because I literally was full on sobbing. I had to leave the room and go someplace private so I didn't wake up my kids, it was that loud. But I realized that if I didn't write my review now, I never would. It would be too hard.
First of all, I need to give Lacey kudos on this book. I seriously don't know how she wrote this it. I can't even imagine the emotions she went through while actually writing out some of these scenes. I literally am baffled. As a writer, I have wrote some emotional scenes that made me sad. But God this would have ripped my heart out and then I wouldn't have been able to continue. On to the review...
Chase Walker is a 17 year old football player who is lost in his grief after his dad dies in a tragic plane crash-ON HIS BIRTHDAY. He becomes destructive...turning to drugs and alcohol to numb his pain. It doesn't work well when after a party with friends they get pulled over for speeding and having marijuana and drunk driving. He spends time in jail until his mom bails him out. Once they get his sentence of community service and pay fines, his mom and him move to his grandparents house on a ranch where he has to make new friends and attend a new school-basically start over. Everyone looks at him like the new bad kid who causes trouble and plays the field. He meets Brett who automatically sees the real Chase without making assumptions. He and Brett hit it off. Chase then sees Nikki Wagner.....
Nikki Wagner is a 17 year old cheerleader who moves on after her father dies of cancer. She was also abused by her ex boyfriend Jeremy, a football player. After that, she swore she'd stay away from football players....
Chase and Nikki meet....they don't hit it off. In fact Nikki won't give him the time of day. But Chase is determined to have her. Once he is told he has to volunteer at the hospital as part of his community service, he runs into Nikki who happens to be the person he is supposed to help pass out packets to the drug and alcohol group session every week. They are both shocked to be there at the same time. But nonetheless, Chase realizes his feelings for Nikki are nothing more than genuine and he truly wants to get close to her. She is just different from the girls he's had sex with and dumped. His feelings are clouding his judgment. After spending more time with Chase, Nikki realizes he may just be the guy she's been searching for.
They date...for a long time, into their senior year. And then after a football game, Nikki and Chase decide it's time to take that step that Chase has been patiently waiting for(Nikki is still a virgin and Chase has been SO good about waiting for her), after the prom....it's their night, they sneak out of their houses to meet. And then there's an accident.....
And I'm stopping there. I will cry again, the water works are right there waiting to spill out. This book all the way up to the last few chapters were AMAZING!!!!!! I fell instantly in love with Chase. And Nikki. One thing I have to say is that I can relate to them both in every way. My father died of cancer when I was 18 and eventhough Chase's was so sudden, it was still painful nonetheless. I had time to prepare like Nikki did but it never softened the blow. A death is sad no matter how it happens-especially with a parent. So as I'm reading this, I'm reliving my past and it hit me so hard, I lost it. I cried for Chase. I cried for Nikki. But she was able to move past it, even though it still hurt her, she took a more positive approach. Chase on the other hand wanted to stop hurting and to numb the pain. Lacey showed us both ways a death affects people. We all grieve in our own way. He was doing better with not drinking or smoking pot, but there was still temptation. And sometimes he felt he wasn't strong enough to cope without it. This book was happy at times, most of the book made you feel good. It was showing how your first love really stays with you always. I could relate to Nikki, I was also abused by an ex. He was a real prick. But once she found Chase and realized that he wasn't like every other guy...things were pretty great!! OH. MY. GOD. I loved him!!!!!!! He was everything real guys should be.
I loved the characters! They all played a big role in this book. Brittany and Brett were twins and became amazing friends to Nikki and Chase. Also most of the guys on the football team showed that not all football players are arrogant assholes. I loved both Chase and Nikki's moms. They both went through the same thing of losing their husbands. It was so difficult for them and I could feel that they were having a hard time dealing with it. But Chase's mom does meet someone and even though he doesn't like it at first, he supports it. I also really liked Chase's grandparents, which are his mom's parents. They always show support even when Chase had slipped a time or two. They understand he's going through a hard time. I think the character dynamic was amazing! She really made me feel for these awesome people. I loved when they did, laughed when they laughed and I sobbed when certain things happened.
The storyline is very heartbreaking from the get go. It gets better then BAM!!!!!! A shocker ending that keeps you in sobs!!!! I can't tell you how much I wanted to quit reading this. My eyes literally had no more tears left. I don't know how this author was able to write this book!!!! I had to take a break because I couldn't see my nook. The words blurred together and I almost gave up but then once I was able to breathe again, I read the rest. Only to be in more tears. Then the letter. OMG, the letter. Holy shit, it really made me bawl and at that time I'd felt numb so I just sobbed right through it. How? Why? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! WHAT THE FUCK??????????????? Those were things that went through my head towards the end. I almost couldn't breathe. Oh Chase. My God Chase. It's weird because I felt this book was written for me. I went through everything they went through. They were living my life. Even that ending, before the prologue....MY LIFE. I swear, I would have been a nervous wreck writing this. I couldn't even write my own book after reading this. As it was I didn't go to sleep til 4 am. I felt like a zombie and my face hurt. I can't say READ OR DON'T READ. But I'm warning you....if you do read this....A box of tissues is needed. Okay, I've said all I can now. My eyes are getting teary again.
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